Studying, Fangirl and Exams.

Haaa. Good to be back. It has been soo long since I posted anything. Busy days. I wouldn’t say busy, exactly, but kind of. I have lots and lots to do at work.I want to learn things and to be good at work. The past couple of months has been an exact opposite of good (at work). I always feel like I do a piece of work in the dumbest way possible. The exams are coming too. So I have to get ready for that. But I couldn’t sit down and get my brain ready for studying sort of thing because it is Summer here.

Tiring, scorching, sweaty, irritating, prickly heat inducing summer. Even sleeping feels like a lot of work, let alone studying. My neurons have become slow. No, I am not 70. It has been only a decade since I left the school ;)( ok and a half). The problem is I want to study, I want to be knowledgeable, but couldn’t. It takes some effort to get back to that study mode. Whatever I do except studying make me feel guilty. So I tried this technique of rewarding myself with something I like if I accomplish a small study task.

Big mistake! Be careful in choosing your reward. It can be a piece of chocolate or a small walk or talk with friends or listen to a favourite song but not a novel especially if you are the one who couldn’t resist the urge to keep reading. I completed the task for the day, and I happily sat down with “Fangirl” book. I shouldn’t have done that. I forgot everything and closed the book only after completing it. But that’s ok. A lesson learned and a different reward next time.

Let’s take a moment to talk about “Fangirl” by Rainbow Rowell. I liked and am still hung over Fangirl. It was like a good cupcake. I was tempted to write a Fangirl Fanfic. There are so many reviews all over the internet, so I am not going to do one.

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I know this is YA genre. I am young and an adult 😉 So I can read this. I still read and watch Harry Potter and I love it like I used to some ten years ago. I usually feel uncomfortable to say aloud that I like children and YA books. I am 200 percent neither of them. I kept questioning my taste and felt not so good that I am mentally still in school (or should I be happy that I am mentally still young). I am not a picky reader, and I don’t know how to critique a book. There are only a few books that I honestly didn’t like among all the hundreds and hundreds that I have read. When I read reviews of people critiquing on my favourite book, I would be like, That’s not that bad. Is my taste that bad? But then who cares. If that is what you like you have to proud of it. The concept of a good book or bad book doesn’t exist. It is what you like and what you don’t.

We constantly worry about others judging us. But the truth is no one has time for that or if they do have time then they don’t have anything important to do and that is not our problem. It’s theirs. To be honest the only one who judges us is we. We are the first one to criticise all our actions and like and everything.

Now, if I complete this exam successfully, I have planned to order some of the books that have been on my “shopping cart” for quite a long time.

Reward yourself!!

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Crafts, Colouring and a Lazy Sunday.

Hmmmmmm. March has just begun but it feels like mid-summer already. I am not a summer person. Summer here is unbearable. It drains me out, makes me want to pull my hair out, and I become irritated more often.
I would prefer freezing to death to burning to death. I completed all the books that I bought in February and waiting for the new set of books to arrive. Well, I have a lot of unread books and lots of work-related books that I have to read within this month and loads of <a href="http://Fabric“>laundry to do. But today I was not in a productive mood. I just wanted to sleep in, eat and sleep again.

Argh! But I don’t like the way I fell on the evening of an overslept Sunday, so I dragged myself out of bed. I wanted to do something, anything, other than studying. I was stressed and wanted to decompress, It had been a very long week. I was disoriented and didn’t know what to do. So I just took out the scissors and started cutting and sticking colour papers on random surfaces. Then I spent some time in peeling them off.

I took some old colour pencils from my childhood(I don’t do colouring and craft often like I used to. But now I am thinking of doing them more). I didn’t have anything to colour in so I coloured the side of a notebook. It turned out good. Why would you want a notebook with coloured sides, you might ask. It is fun to do lame things, Isn’t it?

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Colouring? Done. Cutting? Done. Now what? It’s time to draw something. I wanted a logo for my channel, and I thought of making one today. I aimlessly scribbled things on the whiteboard, and slowly I got the idea for the logo. In fact, I got two. I may or may not use them, But I am so happy with the results.

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I also made two beautiful bangles by putting together some broken earring and old bangles. I was proud of myself and felt like I could make Jewellery for a living.(Just kidding).

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This day went well and now I feel content, accomplished and refreshed. I should do this more often. Try something like this if you are having a not so good day. You don’t have to be perfect. Just dabbling will do.

Books I’ve Decided I’m No Longer Interested In Reading

I don’t remember how long these books have been on my shelf. They were hidden (by me) out of my sight so that I don’t feel guilty. I was rearranging the shelf the other day and found them. I wanted to write a post about them for “TTT”-Top Ten Tuesday.(Ok It is Thursday now)
This is hosted by that artsy reader girl

1. Eat, Pray, Love.

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I bought this book on a whim. I was checking out a book in a shop and, I saw this on the shelf. I liked the title and, I bought it right away. I didn’t even complete the Italy part, let alone complete it. Then I tried watching the film. Nope! I lost my patience in the India part. I don’t even remember why I couldn’t make myself to read it. I will eat, pray and love but won’t read or watch it.

2. Winners stand alone.

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I loved Paulo Coelho’s ” The Alchemist”. I could relate to it. One of my all-time favourite quotes is from this book.

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Expecting this to be something like “The Alchemist” I bought it. I stopped reading when Igor killed that girl from that roadside shop. So there’s going to be lots of murders. Random, innocent people dying for no reason?! Noooo.

3. Ulysses.

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I didn’t give up on this book though I haven’t read even a paragraph since I read it last time ( that was some 6 months ago). IT. IS. A. TOUGH. READ!

4. Dubliners.

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I bought this to find out if all of the James Joyce’s works are as hard as Ulysses. I wanted to read at least one of his works and yes I read one story and, that’s all. Don’t ask if I liked it or I finished reading it.

5. Kalvanin Kaadhali.

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This book was written by Kalki. Almost all people here in Tamil Nadu knows Kalki and, most of them would have read his “Ponniyin Selvan” (Even non- readers read it).I don’t recommend books to people. But I confidently recommend this to all. You will like it. If you can read Tamil and you haven’t read it yet, what are you even doing? READ IT. NOW. I could talk and talk about this book for hours. This is the kind of book that would make you forget to eat, pray, love.

Coming to Kalvanin Kadhali. I loved all his books but this one, no. It’s boring.I even doubt whether it is Kalki that wrote this. I stopped reading it after 10 pages.

6. Men are from Mars Women are from Venus.

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For some, it is the author. For some, it is the book cover. For some, it is the review. For some, it is the friends. For me, it is the Title. A good title can make me buy that book even if it has nothing to do with my subject/ genre/ anything. I should say I didn’t try to read this one. I bought it and placed it on the shelf. The end.

7. The Maze Runner- Series.

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Thank god. I didn’t buy this for me. There was a discount. So, I bought this for my friend’s birthday which is 6 months from now. I couldn’t resist the package. I opened it and tried reading this, forgetting that dystopia is not my place. The only maze I like is from Harry Potter and the Goblet of fire.

Now this book stack that I have ignored for long is in front of making me feel bad. I want to read them but I don’t know if I could. The above books are not bad. They are not for me. Maybe I would read them if I get stuck on an island where there are fire, water and plenty of food.

Ramblings…

It is already 1st of February. A whole month went by, but it felt like only a few microseconds. When I look back, all I did was whining, being super dumb, narrowly escaping from making few blunders, and planning for trips that flopped. I was full of negativity and was <a href="http://Permit“>letting people play with my feelings. I was thinking of all the irrelevant, and outdated worries from years ago and cried till my lacrymal glands tired out.I was full of self-pity, confused, angry, tired and irritated.

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This post was in the draft for the past few days, and now when I look at it, seems entirely irrelevant. I feel totally different. Everything takes its own time. Dwelling on the problems results in puffy eyes, not solutions.

What a way to start 2018! But I like shaky starts. All my favourite books have shaky starts. I have this book superstition that if a book has lengthy intro chapters and slow pace scenes, then there is a very high chance of it becoming one of my favourites. Somehow I managed to finish off the month hoping the coming months would be wonderful.

1. House 2. Stairway 3. Lamp place 4. Window

On my way from work, I see this abandoned house every day. I like old buildings and relics. I managed to overcome the shyness of using a camera in public and captured this. This house would have seen many things and now it stands lifeless without the inhabitants.
What once seemed to be important doesn’t exist now. The happiness, sorrows, problems were true once. But now they are no more and the house stands empty. Our problems will be no more one day. So why to worry about for what is going to be not there one day?

Daily Post Weekly Photo Challenge: Growth

Growth

ABSCISSION
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Let go of the unwanted to make room for new. That is growth!

p.s. I bought a camera because I had been wanting to own one since my childhood and also because I wanted to post my own pictures for my blog posts. I neither know how to use it nor the meaning of the photographic/ camera terminologies. I have been experimenting with it for a week and till now I have figured out how to switch on, zoom and use camera wifi. It is hard but it is fun.

What’s new?!

What’s so special about January 1? Why should I care? I am not related to Janus, I am not even a European, I have my own calendar, it’s not my culture.

Ahhh!! This is what I hear more than the new year wishes. People who celebrate, think about it just for a day or more but who are against it spend more time and energy researching and criticising it live longer at that moment. The anti-new year posts appear even before the shops start to put up new year sales.

Every individual has the freedom to vary. Some celebrate it, some don’t, some speak against it and speak against those who speak against it.

Well, why should I miss another opportunity to send mass wishes to my friends and family, feel merrier, eat more sweets, have fresh hopes, reflect, and start over?

In the past year, I got a job, cleared some notable exams, started this blog ( I didn’t have a schedule and didn’t,t post regularly, though), started learning to write a new language, read some excellent books, got to know many things for the first time, bought a camera, had some wonderful moments with my childhood friends, made some new friends, had a sweet heartbreak, learnt to respect myself even more. 2017 was pretty decent.

I have no resolution except for writing the year correctly as 2018 in important documents and not 2017.

Let’s see what the next 365 days have for us.

Happy 2018!

The blue umbrella -Ruskin Bond

I had forgotten that I like children novels until Amazon recommended me ‘The Blue Umbrella’ by Ruskin Bond. Suddenly all my love for comics and children stories resurfaced, and I ordered it immediately, and as soon as it arrived, I finished reading the 88 pages of the sweet little book in 45 min. It is my first Ruskin bond read, and I have already ordered two more.

It is the story of a girl and her blue umbrella which is obvious from the title. So this little girl Binya trades her tiger claw necklace, which is believed to bring luck and it did bring luck to Binya because of which she was able to get the umbrella, for the new umbrella. Soon the umbrella became the talk of the little village, and everyone wished that they had one like it. A shopkeeper was one among them and all his tactics to lay his hands over the umbrella failed. She had to fight with nature and men to keep it safe, and she took it along with her everywhere she went, and it protected her from sun, rain, wind and even from a serpent once. She refused to close it even while at home. The once bright blue umbrella became a milky blue one. The rain and sun changed its colour, but they couldn’t change her love for the umbrella. After a bitter incident, she decided not to flaunt it because it brought out the bad in others and somehow she felt responsible for that and later she decided to share it with everyone. Binya’s umbrella became the village’s.

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It is a simple story, but the way of writing, the village, the characters, the wind, the monsoon, the Illustrations, two cows (Neelu and Gori) made it a wonderful read. It even broke my writing dormancy and made me write this post. This story brought back the “Heidi” and good old “Tinkle” memories. Even now I couldn’t resist “Tinkle” when I see one in a bookshop stand.
Yes, it is a Children’s book, but why should only children have all the fun. It is a good read for the adults too and a wonderful gift for kids.

P.S. This is my first post in the Read with me category and there are many more to come.

Neophyte

YAY!! IT’S DEEPAVALI……

HAPPY DEEPAVALI !!!!
Happy Deepavali

It’s the holiday season of the year again!! It starts in August and slowly the number of holidays increases. In September comes Navarthri, Eid and somewhere in October or November falls the Deepavali, my birthday;) and in November comes Karthigai(the real festival of lights)and as the December starts the Christmas spirit starts followed by New Year and the festival season ends with Pongal in January. This is my favourite part of the year with lots of rain, holidays, and sweets. After that, the Holidays are like sprinkles on Pizza, rain in the Indian summer month. I watch lots of YouTube, and so Thanksgiving and Halloween are now on my list of Holidays to look forward to.( I don’t know what those are, and we don’t have holidays for that, but I like watching people cooking and enjoying. Virtual Celebration!)

The months before the actual festival day, filled with anticipation, excitement, shopping, and preparation are what make it so special. And today is Deepavali which is celebrated for many reasons that I don’t care. I love it because it brings joy not only to the house but also to the whole country. The grumpy neighbour or the angry colleague or a long lost friend never hesitate to wish on this day.

We start the day with a special sesame oil massage for the head and take a bath in warm water and wear a new dress and eat a lot. Adventurous kids burst crackers and not so Brave adults like me sit inside and watch some TV with Deepavali special sweets and dance like crazy to avoid the drowsiness from all that food and sweets.

Now the day is almost over and the blues of going back to work tomorrow creeps in. Eagerly waiting for the festivals of November and December.

Featured Image : http://bestanimations.com/Holidays/Fireworks/Fireworks.html

https://www.swadesi.com/news/2016/06/12/the-significance-of-deepam-during-prayers-in-india/

http://bestanimations.com/Holidays/Fireworks/Fireworks.html

https://www.swadesi.com/news/2016/06/12/the-significance-of-deepam-during-prayers-in-india/

Cynophobia.

On the way to my office, I saw two puppies sleeping next to each other holding each others paw. It was so cute that I stopped walking and stood there for a while at the cuteness until they woke up and started coming towards me. I jumped and started running, and I was the entertainment of the day for the people there. They would probably be wondering how could a grown-up woman be scared of cute little pups? I am not scared of insects or snakes. I am scared of Dogs.

It all started when I was Five. It was a cold early Sunday morning. While every other kid in the neighbourhood was still nestled in bed, my sister and I decided to play outside with my parents thinking that we were still asleep. I got bored after some time but my sister wanted to keep playing, and so I left her out. I forgot that she was still out and locked the door.

After a while, we heard a scream, and I recognised it as my sister’s, and I was scared. I remember only then that she was out and knew that something bad has happened. We saw her weeping and running towards our home. She was bitten by a dog. Poor little girl! Thankfully we had a rabies research centre in the next town, and she had to take painful injections. Everything was back to normal, but I was full of guilt, and it all turned into the phobia. From then I have been avoiding the streets and friends home where there are dogs.

After another incident, my fear for dogs grew stronger, and I officially became cynophobic. It was a street dog. It kept following. It didn’t chase or bite. It just kept copying my pace. It slowed down when I did; it stopped when I stopped, it was following me all the way long and was waiting for an hour outside. It was creepy, and I felt like living in a ghost movie. I tried finding out why dogs do that but couldn’t. If anybody knows what it is, please do share.

I want to play with dogs and befriend them, but the only thing I could do is look at the sleeping ones while my sister who was the one affected has a pet dog now and is playing happily with him.


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Artist: Fischer, Ed
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